A typical [wo]man's identity

You know, I am a typical woman...or rather I should say a typical human being. There are days when I look in the mirror and I see all that is going right for me...somehow all of my features kind of come together and I look at myself and I'm able to smile and realize that I have a lot going for me and that I can take on the world. Other days....well lets just say it's less so. You know...those days where nothing really seems right -your eyebrows don't match, your teeth are a little crooked, and your hair stands up where you don't want it to...

As people, we all have those days...whatever the quirks are for you. We all have the times when we can see who we are and why people would like us for who we are...and other days we want to hide in a closet and count the seconds until the day is over.

And I've come to realize that this is one of the saddest things about us. Ever since the garden of Eden we, as humans, have failed to recognize our identity and what that means for us.

When you think about God, you generally think about all of the qualities that He is. In the Bible He is even defined by I AM. This thinking holds across into Philosophy. We generally define God by everything perfect, everything powerful, and everything present -and since we have an inadequate way to describe a God we cannot see we describe Him with powerful language.

But have you ever thought about how we define ourselves? We generally define ourselves by the things we are not. If you need proof then think of when you look in the mirror, how often do you see the things you are rather than look for the things you are not?

I think Adam and Eve had the same problem. I think they were comparing themselves to God and saw all the things they were not, instead of all the things that God created them to be. In the garden, Satan was able to draw their attention away from the positives in their relationship with God and onto the things that were seemingly lacking.

When in truth, nothing was lacking at all.

You see, Adam and Eve were exactly who God had made them to be. God loved them for exactly who they were at that moment. He created each part of them with such passion and devotion that it broke His heart when they couldn't see themselves the way God saw them.

And that's the way it is with us.

So often we get into the mindset of what we are not and who we are not that we forget who we are. We are children of a God who fashioned each one of us with His own hands and His own creativity. There is nothing about you (outside of fleshly nature) that God does not love and cherish with His own perfect heart. He is looking down and beaming at each one of us because He can see us for who we are -we are His.

So I think we need to reconstruct the way we see ourselves:

We need to stop believing the lies that we aren't enough,
we need to stop thinking that God created us in a faulty way,
and mostly, we need to start looking at ourselves for who we are instead of letting the world tell us who we are not.

I'm not saying that I understand where to go from here, but I do know that I want to see myself in light of God instead of in light of the world. So I think we need to stop comparing ourselves with each other and the world's standards and start comparing ourselves with who God designed us to be -recognizing the beauty on the outside and fostering beauty on the inside.

And with that, we need to start celebrating the identity we have as ourselves and within our communities.

Kate

Satan's deceptions and self encouragement

I have been thinking and I want you guys to know that not everything was easy in following God's voice and I don't always get it right all of the time. I have told a few people things that I thought I was hearing from God only to find out that it had been something that I had come up with, and some of the things seem really silly now that I think of it.

But what doesn't seem silly is the things that God wants Robert and I to do in the future...and this is something that I have battled with for a long time because honestly it seems to big for us...and something that I don't think I deserve to be chosen for....so naturally I question that I'm hearing God right and whether or not it's from Him.

However, this has led to an opening for Satan and I want to share with you some of the flawed logic that Satan can use to deceive us...and some of the logic he has tried on me.

The first one I'll share is when I was thinking about going to Mexico on a missions trip. I was doubting whether or not God wanted me to go and the pastor of the church I was visiting was talking about how not everyone is called to Missions....but he ended with this word [paraphrased]..."but if you think that you're being called into Missions follow it. God will stop you if he doesn't want you to go, but if you're only stopping because of doubt - know that doubt isn't from God, but from Satan. Satan wants you to doubt what God has told you, so you won't go. God doesn't need to get you to doubt because He will just tell you no if it's not where He wants you to go."

 I don't know if I'm conveying this well enough, but basically doubt is the uncertainty of the truth...or to be afraid of doing the wrong thing...but God's perfect love drives out fear...and God is the truth. It's only Satan who would be trying to bring about the uncertainty of who God is.

So I'm trying not to doubt so much that this huge dream that God has given Robert and I is really from God...and just embrace it......which is really hard because I barely know the beginning of it yet.

The second flawed logic that I experienced from Satan was the dual lies that he has thrown at me...these are the kinda of lies that don't stand up to each other when you share them outloud...the ones that have a tendency of making you feel silly when you share them....

But my biggest worry is that I'm hearing my voice and not God's....so Satan decided to slip the phrase "schizophrenic with delusions of grandeur" into my mind...which in laymen's terms means that I hear voices & imagine myself as greater than I am.

However,

One of the other things I battle with is not feeling like I'm good enough for this dream...

So you tell me how I'm supposed to have delusions of grandeur when I can't even recognize why God would have called me to this- when I don't feel like I'm good enough?

This is an example of Satan's sneaky deceptions.

And another logical reason why I can be positive that this is from God:

I have been trying to throw this dream away because it has me constantly feeling like I'm not good enough -because there's so much growth that needs to happen before I'm capable of fulfilling it...and because I don't know if I'll ever be good enough to fulfill it...so I try to convince myself that it's from me because then I have the control to throw it away.

But I can't let go of it....for the last 6 months. I think if this was from me I would have easily been able to let go of this and walk away.

But God didn't let Moses walk away and hide out forever after he had killed the Egyptian...he could run and hide, but when it came time for his destiny to be fulfilled -God brought him back to where he needed to be to deliver the Israelites...

...and that's what I'm finding to be the case for this dream. God's not letting me walk away from it, but it His timing, He will use me as a vessel to do things I never imagined I would be capable of -because it will be God's power through me.

And that will be worth everything.

That's all for now friends,
Kate

Breaking off the chains of Intimidation 6-6-13

Last night was the night of The Gathering here in Rochester Hills, MI. It's a place where young teens gather at Oakland Christian Church and it's a place where real change happened in my life. To start with I went to a communication group led by Amy Basel and the spirit was using the words that He had given her to speak to three different aspects of my life including my calling, a mentor, and a specific word that he had given to me for Tuesday.

At the end of the message I felt like God was saying that I needed to hug Amy. And I also felt like He was saying to me that I should share my calling in front of people. Both of those things happened later.

It was at the end of the gathering message and worship that I went up and talked to Amy with one of my friends that I grew up with. We greeted with a hug, and I thought that I was just going to encourage her by telling her that her message had an impact in my life in three areas, but I walked away more blessed than I could ever have expected.

Amy asked me about the three areas that God had spoken about and the one was my calling and I told her what God had placed in Robert and my life...in front of Alyssa...confirming the message that God told me to share my calling in front of people...and perhaps one day it will be so in a larger group...who knows?...anyways we continued talking and Amy mentioned something about my lack of belief in my calling -not because I didn't believe that God was capable, but because I didn't believe that God would call me to something so great.

And that hit home because it was the truth.

And we talked a little bit about community and my fear of it...and she spoke another truth...that I was intimidated by people.

And so we prayed about it and we prayed that the chains of intimidation would fall off of me and in that moment I just felt a complete lightness in every aspect of my being. I felt full of the spirit and I felt brand new and as of today I am free of those chains and I see people in a new light.

Before I had put everyone on a kind of pedestal that had to do with my self-image issues and such, but as was spoken over me...it was all in my head.

And in this moment I'm a little afraid that I might revert back to those chains, but I'm choosing to trust God to help me stay in freedom because I have the power to walk without intimidation from man. I have the ability to stand in front of celebrities and people the world considers important and not feel unimportant in comparison because I am a child of God created in His image -with His spirit pouring through me and I have a great calling on my life- and I am free.

So I look forward to my new relationships with people and the social skills that God is going to cultivate in me and bestow upon me.

Because as was spoken over me...Satan attacks most where your greatest ministry lies.

And that, my friends, for me is community.

And so as I'm writing this to you now, I'm thinking back to one of my lasts posts about fearing community and all I can think about is how awesome the power of God is. I, in my own power, could not have gone from fear to conquering is so short of time. That is the power of God! He is able to do miracles in our lives where we feel like we are going to have to trudge on our own. But our lives are not our own battle, because all our obstacles have already been defeated by Jesus who goes before us and we just have to walk in obedience and faith and trust that those obstacles will not stand in our way because they have already been defeated.

Excited to be standing here in the victory of the spirit,
Kate

Moses and the Mount of [in]Security

In life we see people who have done great things and we assume that they are great people. That it was the people that make the deeds. However, this is not the case...I mean sure they are great people, but they themselves are not GREAT.

I found myself thinking when I was listening to a sermon about conquering insecurity and they were talking about how Moses is generally depicted as the 10 commandments guy or the parting of the Red Sea guy. And yes he was there for those things, but those identifiers belong to God.

The point of the sermon started with Moses' insecurities at the beginning of when God called him and how he needed Aaron's help to fulfill God's plans. But I'm not so sure that his insecurities ever went away.

I can picture Moses walking up Mount Sinai battling insecurities and doubts...you know the same ones that plague you when you have a new idea or are doing something new for God. But I think the thing that helped Moses through, or at least I'd like to think so because it's what has helped me through, is remembering the signs of the past. With Moses' insecurities, God never stopped giving him and the Israelites signs that this was God's will and that God was with him. I think when Moses was going up on the mountain he was thinking back to the burning bush, back to passover, back to the Red Sea, and then to his feasts on Manna...I think as Moses was trusting and being obedient to God, he was turning back to the signs and miracles in his times of insecurities.

And it's the same way with us today.

I think when we are feeling insecure about who God made or more specifically in my case -what He has called us to do. I think we need to keep trusting and obeying and reflect on the times that God has carried us through. The times that God has called us to obey and at the end of the day were a success. Those are our miracles that we can build our faith and security on.

So at the end of the day when you're feeling insecure...look down at your foundation because you better believe that when your foundation is the Lord -there's nothing more secure.

Prayer Drawing -Fear of community.

To me, this picture represents how I feel about community. I really don't know how to express the feelings that led to this picture, but the water droplet that is falling is a tear that comes down from my fear of opening up, to being vulnerable, and being an active part of community.

One of my strengths is the ability to help others open up and to be able to encourage them in what's going on in their life. One of my biggest weaknesses -allowing others to do the same for me.

When I think about doing that in my own life I always struggle with thinking about why the individual would care because it seems like a silly thing to tell them what's going on in my life. I always downsize how much it hurts me because I'm used to keeping things bottled inside. It may seem like I'm strong to keep things together, but it's a weakness in an inability to share what is going on inside of me.

However, I've found that as much as I want to keep things bottled up and hold on to them, I've found that what's in my heart still seems to leak out, just a little, but enough to give me hope that it's the right thing. In the times that I encourage others, and open myself up a little to encourage them, I find that I'm watering a little bit of the dry ground in my life.

So the dry ground represents the community in my life. The little sprout of life shows that it's not because the ground isn't fertile, but because I haven't watered it in my own life. I am trying to learn to water it with tears of happiness and tears of sadness. To let people into my life, into my insecurities, so they can lift me when I'm afraid or broken, and rejoice with me when there are blessings or accomplishments.

I'm learning -or hoping, that with the right community of love around me, I can learn how to open up and let other people help cultivate my life.

I hope that maybe my experience might give you the strength to do the same. Perhaps your issue isn't with community and opening up in general, maybe there's some small area that you're afraid to open up to others about, or opening up to God. You're holding on to your pain so tight that you're not allowing life to come out of your experience. Perhaps together we can learn to let go of our pain and just see what happens in our lives.

With the hope of having the strength to be "weak",
Kate

Prayer Drawing -Rocks of my faith

This was done during a period of silence from God. This picture is very symbolic as each thing represents the rocks of my faith that I hold on to when God doesn't seem as present as He normally does. The crosses obviously represent Christ as the rock of my salvation, and the mountain represents the upward battle of following Him. The pile of rocks represent the 12 stones that the Israelites took out of the Jordan River as reminders of the things that God had done for them. To me, this makes me remember the times that God has moved in my life -from the way that I met Robert, to my experience in the river, and the little things that God does throughout the week. And the gems on the ground represent the scriptures that give me comfort. I've always called the lesser known scriptures -the ones that aren't the overused "cliches"- the gems of the Bible. 

Throughout the time that I was working on this I really felt a connection to God even when I couldn't feel His presence or hear anything from Him. It's a reminder that when I don't understand the present and I don't know what's going to happen in the future, I can always lean on the past and know that God has been there for me and because He has I know He always will.

So I would urge you to think about what you set as the rocks of your faith. Try to reflect on it during your "mountain top" experiences when everything seems crystal clear and then write it down so you can remember it and encourage yourself when things don't seem to be going the way that you want them to. When you don't hear God and you don't know what He's doing...or when you're being attacked in your faith. 

Or even if you're not in a mountain top experience, try to think back to the things that God has done in your life, when He's made Himself known to you and try to remember the reactions that you had to that. Remember that God is the same today as He was then. He is the great I AM and if He's not blessing you, He's probably teaching you. 

Trust Him because above everything else, He's loving you.

Kate.

Public Speaking

So guys,

So I had 3 and a half presentations this week. And a miracle happened. During one of them I wasn't even nervous at all....well that was mainly because I wasn't actually presenting. I was doing the powerpoint for one of my friends. But it was the first time that I was actually in front of people and was completely at peace. This is a milestone for me my friends.

The other ones aren't really notable, except the fact that I did them. They were two psychology presentations at my school.

The last was one that I was super nervous about for all the semester and that was my private voice juries. This one is a major accomplishment for me...I'll be the first to admit that it wasn't the best. This was mainly because I was SO nervous that I shook and trilled the whole way through. However, I find this to be a huge accomplishment from the last time I sang in front of people...I was so nervous that I giggled the whole way through.

But I just wanted to share with you a bit of my journey, so that someday when hopefully i'm a proficient public speak ;) you'll know that it wasn't always the case...and you can do it too!

Insecurities and such

Hey guys,

Things are going pretty rough for me right now. I'm thinking about the future and what God wants me to do and I feel so inadequate. I keep trying not to think about it and just focus on the present, but I feel pretty inadequate there as well. Things aren't really peachy right now. I mean don't get me wrong, my life is far from where it has been, but we are all our own worst critics right?

I'm so scared about having to get up and do public speaking in front of people...and my life is going to be full of it. Big crowds. Little crowds. Hand mics...those ones that go around your ear... Some people are made for this kinda thing. I'm not. I'm more of a behind the scenes as far away from the spotlight as possible kinda girl. And for me to know that so many people are going to be watching me and listening to me in the future is really intimidating. Public speaking is a common fear, so I know there's plenty of you out there who are with me on this, but I just wish I wasn't afraid of 80% of my future career.

I feel like Moses when God told him His plan. Except, Moses got the option of Aaron....I don't get that luxury. So guys, I'm telling you, if I ever get good at public speaking it will be by the grace of God. It's going to be all Him because trust me, I can't do it.

As for the other stuff, soon that will be all over. Private voice is kicking my butt. I'm not meant to be a solo singer and I have to face juries in about 10 days...Juries is kinda a scary thing for people who are super good singers at my school and well...my vocal teacher said I'm not bad... :p Here's to hoping my G.P.A. doesn't drop over this "confidence booster".

And I'm going out on a limb and being all sorts of vulnerable (okay...not so much) with one of my teachers, doing meetings and stuff. And part of me thinks that she sees me as this psycho with these crazy dreams that I've worked up to get her attention (because I've told her a lot of what God has told me I'm going to do in the future). If that doesn't add an unknown element I don't know what does. So I'm always super nervous whenever we meet, and if there was ever something that makes me awkward -it would be nerves. So add the awkward to the vulnerability to the not knowing what she thinks of me to the fact that this is the first time I've opened up to someone about so much and I'm kinda an internal wreck.

Anyways, thanks for sticking with me through this blog post. I'm obviously not expecting a lot of encouragement because a lot of you will find this blog waaaaaaaay after the fact of many of these issues, but I just wanted to open up to you guys on a more vulnerable level and show you that God definitely qualifies the called and not the other way around because I do SO not feel qualified to be called to whats in store in the future.

Kate.

Soon

Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon.Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. Soon. 


Soon. This is the word that we've been hearing from God lately. Soon. Will be the transition from training to building. Soon. God will start speaking to us more and giving us more direction for our life. Soon. Robert will be graduating from college and getting a job by June. Soon. Soon. Soon. 

It's a little bit exciting, but as with everything....we don't exactly know what soon means with God. To God 1 day is like 1,000 years and 1,000 years is like a day. With that frame of time....what could soon mean?

Robert's graduating soon, but that's 1 month away. Hopes coming over soon, but that's 12 hours away. I get off work soon, but that's 1 hour and 1/2 away. 

There's no way to know exactly when soon is to God. Patience has to come with that answer, and when we know...we'll update....soon.

Until then, with patience and excitement,
Kate.

Prayer drawing: The hands of God and Adam.

          This is the first of my spiritual prayer drawings (yes I drew this!). This may be something a lot of you guys know about, but something I just learned about, and I really like it. I have found that there has been real power in the times that I am spending thinking about God and just letting my spirit pray.
          The other thing that I really like about it and what made me first try it when it was explained to me, is that it brings a new perspective to prayer. Instead of bringing a to-do list to God...it gets you praying about different things -more abstract things.


       This week I found myself thinking about how God reaches out to God and how I reach back to Him. This was really easy as it was Easter time...the ultimate God reaching out to mankind story. However, things began to get even more personal as the week went on....it was as if my week was following this reaching out theme.

       I have another post about how I'm going on a God-date with Robert. This is because God personally reached into my life and wants to celebrate my efforts as a wife and how I've stood by Robert's side during some hard times last semester. But God wants to celebrate something in my life. How crazy is that! It's a new way that I get to experience God. It's so cute. And it really brings me to look at God in a new way. It's not about rules and doing things. God wants a relationship with us, and like a parent, He wants to be celebrating our successes with us. God wants to be in on our community -in our life...not just us always striving for His... :)

        The next little story that I have has to do with one of my friend here at the college. We were having a random devotional life chat date and as usual God just blessed us with wonderful conversation. We were talking about where we were at with God and we were in the same place. We were both talking about how it seemed that God wasn't talking to us at the moment and how it didn't seem like we fit into the tradition explanations to why God was speaking to us (these generally are sin or that we weren't obedient to the last thing God called us to do).

         As we were talking we began to gain a new perspective on the situation. That perhaps it wasn't anything that we were doing wrong, but that we were just walking silently, side-by-side with the Lord, like two lovers who are completely content in the moment, just breathing it in. It's like when you get to that point in a relationship when you don't need to fill in the silences. When there aren't any directions needed for the future, no discipline needed -and you're just able to be content in each other's presence.

       So this week I would say that I've just gained some new perspectives on who God is and how He wants to relate in our lives. In a world where we are always being told we aren't enough...even in churches we are always being told the next spiritual thing to work on (listen to God, how to pray, etc) God is saying....just being with me is enough. Just spend time with me....no gimmicks, no three step plan to hear my voice, just simply spending time with me in relationship....it's taking it back to it's simplicity.

      I think we live in a world where we try to complicate and twist things. In America, we live in a society that says whoever is the most busy is the most important. We idolize church goers who volunteer for everything as the standard to live up to. But really, our relationship with God isn't about how much we tithe, how many hours a week we spend at church, or how much we are out there doing things for God....those are all missing the point.
 
       In any other relationship, it's not about how much we pay someone, how many hours we running errands for them...it's about spending time communicating with them...getting to know them...the heart to hearts. That's what God wants...He wants our lives to be a constant heart to heart with Him....so why are we complicating things?

God date part 1 (4-6-13)

SO, I'm currently getting ready for a God date....you may be wondering what that is...no it's not church. Really it's something completely new to me as well. You see God and Robert have been collaborating on a surprise date for me that's supposed to start in a couple hours and last all day.

CAN YOU SAY EXCITEMENT!


Okay, so you might be wondering how it all got started: A couple weeks ago God led Robert to the Proverbs 31 chapter -you know the one about being a Godly wife....apparently that's me. :) because God wanted Robert to tell me that He's proud of me (which is one thing coming from God and another thing coming from your husband)...it's already hard enough to grasp that God thinks I'm being a good wife -I mean His standards are pretty high....

But I guess God thought I needed some more encouragement, or rather Robert needed some teaching on spoiling me? I don't know, I don't pretend to understand God's motives. But He had Robert go on a God walk three different times and He has inspired Robert to make this super awesome date for me in order to spoil me :)

Well I have to get ready, so I'll update you when it's over!

Devotional on trust and intimacy (2-25-13)

Lately, God has really been teaching me and growing me internally.

When the semester started I really felt like God was saying: this semester is you and Me. Growth time.

And it has been. It is currently midterm week of my Junior year and looking back on it I've grown SO much internally.

• I have learned to embrace friendships and actually be a part of them instead of having one sided relationships. (for anyone who knows me now, I'm really good at letting people talk to me about their problems and I'll give advice, but before this semester, I would never put forth MY problems. Yea, I would say things that related to them, but never what I was struggling with now. 
• I currently have my very first VP. This stands for vulnerability partner. Right around Valentine's Day I asked one of my best friends to be my vulnerability partner and be my guinea pig as I learn how to share and open up about myself. This has proved to be one of the best things in my life because I've noticed that as I share with her, it becomes easier to share with others. 
• I am learning to fight for relationships and healing. I'm struggling to hold on to a friendship right now and struggling to be a part of this relationship for a different reason than the others. And I'm finding it hard to hold on to the friendship that God wants us to have because of the pain that we've encountered over the summer. And I'm struggling to learn to give up that pain and to trust someone who's bruised my trust (with the right motives). So that's some growth in progress.
• I've learned that trust is a choice. I was praying about a relationship I'm developing with one of my I guess you'd say mentor? and I was struggling about being involved and how I felt about it and whether or not it was safe and as I was praying I heard God say, "Do you trust her?" and my response was I could. He didn't like that answer and He replied, "Trust is a choice- do you trust her?" and in that moment, I made a huge decision for me. I decided, yes, I'm all in. She already means too much for me to lose the small bit that we have, so yes, I trust her. And in that moment I just felt such peace and happiness that only comes from when I KNOW I'm following God and His path. 
• One of the other things that has happened this semester is a trip to the past. I had a meeting with my old Sunday night youth group leader about hearing God's word and how you know it's from God. Spirit talk if you will. And as we sat there and talked for three hours about our lives and experiences we've had with the ways God has talked to us, it made us both realize how far I'd come. I used to meet at her house Wednesday mornings and chat with some girls from youth group....well I didn't do much talking. I wasn't able to open up and really be involved, and these three hours really showed how far I'd come.
• The other thing that I did was branch out into more friendships. I asked people that I kinda wanted to be friends with, but didn't know if they wanted to be friends with me. If you're a girl or an introvert, or anything like me at all, you know the feelings I mean...the awkward insecurity. And I really mean awkward because when I don't know where I stand in a relationship, I'm very awkward. BUT I did it! and we had a marvelous time -get this- talking about introversion and how it makes things awkward and we bonded over our mutual introversion. And hey, I know some people question how two introverts can be friends, but hopefully we'll make it work, and even if it doesn't, I'm rejoicing in this accomplishment.

And this is just the beginning. I know I have more to grow and stuff to learn -including wisdom- but I wanted to share with you these inner parts of me, so that way when I get where I am going, it will be a reminder to me and knowledge to you of the awkward, introvert with intimacy and trust issues that I started out as and a testimony to God of the person that I will become. 

Blessings,

Kate